Preshrunk » T-Shirts

So where did you go to art school?

Gregg — Thu, 23 Feb 2012 20:48:18 +0000

Not gonna lie, this one hit a little close to home. As one skilled in the soft sciences, I see the value of aesthetic and intellectual pursuits that aren’t covered in an economics class. But if I put on my cynic’s cap for a second, I get the joke. I think people are afraid of art school because they either don’t see how it makes money, or think that it makes a pagan orgy look like Church Chat. Either way you look at it, you’ll either strike up a conversation about someone’s summer abroad studying erotic Italian sculpture or get a high-five from the person that thinks Art School is an incubator of sin. In both of these scenarios, you’re on the winning side. And that’s a pretty good way to play it. $21.99 | URL Mens | Paypal Credit | * Limited Sizes Available! M: S , XL

Unicorn Cubed

Gregg — Thu, 09 Feb 2012 18:35:56 +0000

This shirt’s got a lot going on, and I love every second of it. Aside from its obvious correlation to three wolf moon and the bitchin’ unicycle (which may as well be called the NutRacker), this bad boy is sporting a unibrow that would makes a Frida Kahlo self-portrait look tweezed. But there’s a reason that this fella’s kicking up some wizard dust from that badass solo wheel. His heart is pure. He’s a Unicycle Shredder. It takes some unicorn-grade balls to rock a forehead caterpillar like that. And confidence like that, you just can’t knock down. On a final note – you know that unicorn totally sings The Final Countdown every time they shred the gnar. $21.99 | URL Mens Womens | Paypal Credit | M: S - XXL, F: S - L

Respect

Gregg — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 19:20:09 +0000

There’s a lot to be said for simplicity. Even though the type seems as exciting as a Victorian first date, the message behind this shirt is clear: Respect. Don't be thrown by the font though. You either love the Pride and Prejudice vibe, or someone you know would respect you for it. No mystery behind this one, kids. The message is clear. Rep the respect, and respect what you rep. Sorry for the surprise gangsta rap. Felt like I needed a palate cleanser after all that Victorian business. $25.00 | URL Mens Womens Youth| Paypal Credit | Multiple shirt styles - Size availability varies between styles.

Great Scott

Gregg — Thu, 26 Jan 2012 20:35:32 +0000

This one celebrates two of my dearest loves – Back to the Future, and Calvin & Hobbes. Both sustained me when I was a kid – although I still wonder sometimes about Doc and Marty. In this sendoff, arguably better than those pissing decals (feel free to customize one and send it to a crush. Or your boss.), Calvinized Doc and Marty let everyone know you’re still in touch with what matters. In other words – Date Bait. Enjoy. $24.00 | URL Mens | Paypal, Credit | M: S - 3XL

Don’t Trip

Gregg — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 16:17:21 +0000

Hulk Hogan. Wilford Brimley. Gandhi. That handsome bastard Tom Selleck. What do they have in common? A Lip Bush that separates the boys from the men. And if there’s one way that a Mustache levels up, it’s by throwing a double-fist Shaka Bra. If there’s one way to remind someone they need to stop tripping, it’s the ultimate in Island hand gestures from America’s Jamaica – Hawaii. Home of, most notably, Dog the Bounty Hunter. Take a page out of Magnum’s book – don’t trip. $24.00 | URL Mens | Paypal Credit | M: S - L

Brit Skull

Gregg — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 19:32:38 +0000

Here’s one for all you Anglophiles out there. (I’m really hoping you read that in Casey Kasem’s voice. Sidebar – Casey Kasem’s still kicking around. I hope I sound that sultry when I’m nearly 90.) It’s Brit Skull – and it makes a perfect belated Boxing Day gift for any Harry Potter fan that’s be-bopping around your world. Now, I know that not all of us can pull off the look of these young inked bruisers, but flying the Union Jack on a skull that stretches your torso will certainly send Her Majesty a message from her cousins across the pond. And since I like you, and you probably don't like currency conversion, 20 British sterlings is about 30 of our American dollars. Not bad, Sinstar. $31.20 | URL Mens | Paypal | M: XS - XL

Fight the Power

Gregg — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 19:24:37 +0000

There’s really no two ways about it, the amish are pretty tough folk. They raise a barn like a mug, and they’ve been satirized by the king. But even more impressive is that they’ve never heard of the Kardashians. And that, I respect. In the grand tradition of Amish defiance – and because I hope to channel some of their awesome beard-growing mojo – I’m going to fight the power. Answer the call of the Mennonite Madmen, my peers. Join your Amish brethren – and Chuck D. Fight the power. $19.97 | URL Mens Womens | Paypal Credit | M: S - 2XL, F: S - 2XL

Marioflage

Gregg — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 17:29:59 +0000

Now that the holidays are (for the most part) blissfully over, ‘tis the season to treat myself to a piece of urban flair. After all, I’ve braved the storm. I’ve wrapped up family time without having a National Lampoon meltdown. And what better way to reward myself for the sanity-bending time with the fam’ than to Deck the Abs with some boughs of badass. Mario’s back. But let’s be real, he never really left. Join me in my new tradition – MeMas. It’s kind of like XMas, but it’s for you. Treat yourself, sweetheart. You’ve earned it. But look alive, kids. This bad boy’s priced to move. It’s on sale right now, but who knows how much longer that’s going to be. So I say in the spirit of MeMas – this is gonna look bitchin. Update: They are selling out of this one fast! Only small sizes left. I'll have to look for another MeMas gift. :'( $30-$35 | URL Mens| Paypal Credit | M: XS - S

When Pigs Fly

Gregg — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 20:35:08 +0000

I remember when my granddad used to offer me a twenty-dollar bill. When I went to grab it, he’d yank it out of reach like that succubus from Peanuts and cry “When pigs fly!” Well, screw you old man. I’ve got my own twenty dollars now, and I spent it to toss in the face of you and your flighted-porcine doubting crowd. It’s called heavier-than-air flight, gramps. It was probably called “witchcraft” when you were coming up, but now we just call it science. Next time I see my granddad, I’m going to show him my shirt. And take my twenty dollars. $32.00 | URL Mens | Paypal, Credit | M: S - XXL

Dance Your Ass Off

Gregg — Thu, 15 Dec 2011 14:52:17 +0000

When Kevin Bacon was taking guff from this shitkicker, did he sit there and just take it? No. Not only did he completely destroy him in tractor chicken, he did exactly what a townie’s t-shirt told him. He danced his ass off. My recommendation? Be like the bacon. Don’t take no guff. And let everyone know what you think. And if that doesn’t work? Start a poor man’s Oasis with your brother. I was going to include a Bacon Brothers clip here, but thought better of it. You’re all welcome. $20.95 | URL Womens | Paypal, Credit | F: S - XL