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Yearly Archives: 2011


Written on December 29, 2011 at 12:29 pm, by

Now that the holidays are (for the most part) blissfully over, ‘tis the season to treat myself to a piece  Continue Reading »

When Pigs Fly

Written on December 22, 2011 at 3:35 pm, by

I remember when my granddad used to offer me a twenty-dollar bill. When I went to grab it, he’d yank  Continue Reading »

Dance Your Ass Off

Written on December 15, 2011 at 9:52 am, by

When Kevin Bacon was taking guff from this shitkicker, did he sit there and just take it? No. Not only  Continue Reading »

Gorilla Cop

Written on December 8, 2011 at 1:27 pm, by

People may not always like dealing with the police – but you can bet things would be pretty tense if you  Continue Reading »

Home Geeves

Written on December 1, 2011 at 5:25 pm, by

When E.T. phoned home the first time, he had to make do with a busted milk crate and a ten-speed.  Continue Reading »

Bowling is for Lovers

Written on November 23, 2011 at 1:41 pm, by

I’m pretty into bowling. It’s one of the only sports you can play between bites of chicken wings – which means  Continue Reading »

The Raven

Written on November 17, 2011 at 2:17 pm, by

I want to take you to Baltimore, Maryland, 1849. No, not literally – we don’t have time to get it to  Continue Reading »

I ♥ Unicorns

Written on May 25, 2011 at 2:49 pm, by

What’s not to love about unicorns? Seriously? Their horns can cure cancer, they poop rainbows, and they make a tasty spam  Continue Reading »

Thank You

Written on May 18, 2011 at 10:38 am, by

Sun Tzu knew that the subtlety of battle was a delicate dance. You have to draw your enemy close to  Continue Reading »

T Party

Written on May 11, 2011 at 8:37 am, by

What do a Nobel laureate, B.A. Baracus, the Shat, and an O.G. have in common? I’ll bet my chain-wearing, alien-fighting, pale-rapping,  Continue Reading »