Category Archives: T-Shirts

Respect

There’s a lot to be said for simplicity. Even though the type seems as exciting as a Victorian first date, the message behind this shirt is clear: Respect. Don’t be thrown by the font though. You either love the Pride and Prejudice vibe, or someone you know would respect you for it. No mystery behind [...]

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Great Scott

This one celebrates two of my dearest loves – Back to the Future, and Calvin & Hobbes. Both sustained me when I was a kid – although I still wonder sometimes about Doc and Marty. In this sendoff, arguably better than those pissing decals (feel free to customize one and send it to a crush. Or your [...]

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Don’t Trip

Hulk Hogan. Wilford Brimley. Gandhi. That handsome bastard Tom Selleck. What do they have in common? A Lip Bush that separates the boys from the men. And if there’s one way that a Mustache levels up, it’s by throwing a double-fist Shaka Bra. If there’s one way to remind someone they need to stop tripping, [...]

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Brit Skull

Here’s one for all you Anglophiles out there. (I’m really hoping you read that in Casey Kasem’s voice. Sidebar – Casey Kasem’s still kicking around. I hope I sound that sultry when I’m nearly 90.) It’s Brit Skull – and it makes a perfect belated Boxing Day gift for any Harry Potter fan that’s be-bopping around [...]

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Fight the Power

There’s really no two ways about it, the amish are pretty tough folk. They raise a barn like a mug, and they’ve been satirized by the king. But even more impressive is that they’ve never heard of the Kardashians. And that, I respect. In the grand tradition of Amish defiance – and because I hope to channel [...]

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Marioflage

Now that the holidays are (for the most part) blissfully over, ‘tis the season to treat myself to a piece of urban flair. After all, I’ve braved the storm. I’ve wrapped up family time without having a National Lampoon meltdown. And what better way to reward myself for the sanity-bending time with the fam’ than [...]

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When Pigs Fly

I remember when my granddad used to offer me a twenty-dollar bill. When I went to grab it, he’d yank it out of reach like that succubus from Peanuts and cry “When pigs fly!” Well, screw you old man. I’ve got my own twenty dollars now, and I spent it to toss in the face [...]

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Dance Your Ass Off

When Kevin Bacon was taking guff from this shitkicker, did he sit there and just take it? No. Not only did he completely destroy him in tractor chicken, he did exactly what a townie’s t-shirt told him. He danced his ass off. My recommendation? Be like the bacon. Don’t take no guff. And let everyone [...]

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Gorilla Cop

People may not always like dealing with the police – but you can bet things would be pretty tense if you had this silverback knocking his baton on your door. Let’s celebrate freedom from our simian brothers with this cool, and kind of frightening, shirt from fiftyseven-thirtythree. Although if there were some sort of Island of [...]

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Winning

Toward the end of February, some actor was making a lot of bad decisions. Just days later, the first email hit my inbox: (Since Sam was “first” here’s that link, in case you, a devoted Preshrunk reader, find this shirt to your liking.) Within a couple days after that, my inbox began to resemble this [...]

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